So Once Upon a Time....(pt2)

So one day when I was on the way home from work a girlfriend of mine invited me to her house and told me to head over there but she may be an hour or so late so in the meantime to stop by her sisters and grab the house key so I could get in. So after stopping by Stake and Shake and grabbing a smoked turkey sandwich, I headed over to her sisters house to grab the key. When I got there, as any normal person would, I knocked on the door to grab my girlfriends extra house key only to find her sister alone in the house trying on the lingerie she had just bought eating ice cream and parlaying on a glass of wine. So after asking me if I wanted anything to drink and trying to make 5 minutes of conversation before I left she came up to me and whispered in my ear "I have feelings for you and I'm ready and willing to have sex if you are so are you just gonna stand there or are you gonna do something about it?" So without saying anything further, I immediately turned around and walked to the front door to go to my car. And what do you know....I found my girlfriend standing there, she hugged me and said: "You've won my trust".......

Moral of the story: always keep your condoms in the car! The end.....

So Once Upon a Time....

So as the story goes....A white woman, about 51 years old, was seated next to a black man on an airplane. Obviously disturbed by this, she called the air hostess. “Madam, what is the matter?” the hostess asked. “You obviously do not see it,” she responded. “You placed me next to a black man. I do not agree to sit next to someone from such a repugnant group. Give me an alternative seat.” “Be calm please,” the hostess replied. “Almost all the places on this flight are taken. I will go to see if another place is available.” The Hostess went away and then came back a few minutes later. “Mam, I spoke to the captain and he informed me that there is also no seat in the business class. All the same, we still have one place in the first class.” Before the woman could say anything, the hostess continued, “It is not usual for our company to permit someone from the economy class to sitin the first class. However, given the circumstances, the captain feels that it would be scandalous to make someone sit next to someone so disgusting.” The hostess turned to the black man and said “Therefore, Sir, if you would like to, please collect your hand luggage, a seat awaits you in first class.” At that moment, the other passengers who were shocked by what they had just witnessed stood up and applauded.

Moral of the story: Don't gamble with ya life duke word up! LMAO!