The Tales and Adventures of Psycho Bob

In lieu of all the ball busters out there and an overwhelming number of WTF experiences I've had over the yrs with women - Scratch that, WE UP!

I've decided to create a  page called "The Tales and Adventures of Psycho Bob" dedicated to relationships to archive a rap-sheet of all the crazy things that people go through and deal with in their journey for happiness in relationships, unfortunately at times even me. But by no means will this list be exhaustive or comprehensive but its only my attempt to shed a little light of a variation of some of the evil, "you said what?", and some of the loopy things that occur when dealing with that "special situation." - 1 luv


LMAO

WTF these bitches on coke? Ain’t nobody up this type of morning but bitter bitches & bitches on coke….LMAO

1. What they want you to believe
2. What it really is
3. What it actually is!!!

"…eventually you can start telling lies to yourself so much they begin to sound like the truth.” - Denzel Washington (Safe House)
......and the irony is in less than 24 hrs then she emails me this..WOW



Picasso Baby



Ignorant Shit



….ummm??? OK.


#TheMostUltimateHaterShitIeverHeard






Online Poll..anyone????

So what do you do exactly…when someone who feels hurt that you don’t care anything about, has shown to have nothing to offer, or you don’t pay any kind of attention to sends you 17 text messages at 5am and texts you pictures of someone else (presumably, that they seem to be spending their time with) like you are supposed to care?

A. Care less
B. Care even less
or C. Oh I know….keep on going about ya own lil marry way because after all, you could care less

Man…Its $50 in it for whoever can help me make such a difficult decision LMAO! I really need you guys help PLEASE!

Relationship Theory




Who hasn't loved a person for all the same, right, and wrong reasons?

I guess the interesting thing about people is that they often put themselves in a position where they are not in control of their hearts fate….


That’s what makes romance in the 21st century so volatile! 


At a certain point the love you share w/ someone becomes the love you can’t seem to find in yourself!


Losing yourself in someone can be translated into a very sexual joke! But indeed, it is the most intense feeling in the world...


Here we go Again...Psycho Bob Strikes once Again!



Oh so were you doing on Sat? "Oh nothing just getting assassinated!" LMAO


Shitted on em...


So i was looking through some old paperwork and found this list that i made during a time when my ex and I decided to write a list of all the things that we didn't like about each other LMAO...Damn...I must have really couldn't stand that bitch! And apparently my black ass can't spell either LOL!


My downfall...


...Hopefully one day things will get better with time

This goes out to you, and you, and you, and you...



Here we go Again...


Yo you ever tell someone that you'll call them back and then 15 minutes later they call you again asking you who you are talking to and whats taking you so long? oh so that 15 minutes felt like an eternity huh? LMAO!

And then because you don't answer the phone they call you like 18 times and send you a hundred text messages.....oh really? and only to prove what exactly? to try and convince me that you are not crazy and its my fault for being insensitive and I should "have known better" because you get obsessive over bullshit? LOL

Oh I know...like of all of the other things that someone could be doing in life you are sitting there waiting on me huh? Man listen....#Next

#IcanSeeYouGotHateInYaBlood


Its kinda easy to see why you got hate in ya blood when you work at the front desk and only get a 30 minute lunch break LOL. Shit I think I'd be mad to if I only had enough time to eat a cup of applesauce and 2 slices of wheat bread LMAO

But anyway, look FYI Yo: Nobody could care less! If I wanted your attention then I would come over there and take that shit or go back and forth with all day looking stupid! And besides I thought I already told you 6 or 7 months ago that you are a throw-a-way anyway! So if you think I'm saying anything foul then I think that theres really 2 issues going on there #1 - the fact that you are consistently checking on me in the 1st place (AKA: twitter stalker) and #2 - If I say something that you think fits the likelihood that I could be talking about you then that probably means that you are insecure or just a whack or ridiculous as the things i'm expressing in the 1st place!....so what, then I'm really supposed to pick up the phone to hear to talk about something that I said that you think is really about you to tell me what my problem is #GETTHEFUCKOUTTAHERE...who are you? Barack Obama n!gga? Man please....

Word of the Day!

                                              
                                            #POOFPOWBEGONE


Yeah you too...But you are a Fake, Phony, and a Stan to the 2nd power

Round of Applause!

But FYI: Stop biting my shit....#getoffthebooboo huh? LMAO! It was whack and week ago right but now you are on twitter trending my $hit. Man you are faker than a phony! And then you've got the nerve to try and reply to me with some soft ass email - #foodforthought - stick ya face in fish grease if you don't know how to keep it real with me! And stop biting my $hit. You are a fake, phony, and a Stan and it's showing through your pores!

100


Nah....Word??


A yo you remember when we were all kids and there was that riddle...how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Well god damn...How many times I gotta hang up on ya ass and ignore ya phones calls before you get the message that maybe I'm over this ish? You ever notice how some chics do things to lash out at you & bait you for a response but then say that they don't want nothing else to do with you or all of a sudden pop up asking you why you "acting like this?"...now maybe I"m retarded but does that even make sense...Hell nah!!!

Walk around fronting to everybody else and know you over there lying to yourself...yeah I know it sucks but roll ya funky ass on!  And I ain't even that type dude to try and bomb on somebody...but honestly this ish is like flash cards 1+1 = 2 not 5 LMAO!

One Love

Love, Live Life, Progress...(One Lesson I Learned Last Night From a Female HipHop Head)


"Just keep doing you.....and who ever you come across someone that can help you do even even better..then thats when you stop doing you and start do ya'll, walk those dogs, and then raise those babies"


When it Rains it Pours...


"Listen lil' homie, when it rains it pours
And when niggaz get fed up, when it rains it pours
It usually, goes down over money and whores
But lil' homie in my hood, when it rains it pours"

It's amazing....I'd never think I've ever have to get law enforcement involved just to make ensure I protect myself from losing everything over something domestic from getting caught up in the emotions spirals of a carrying a relationship. And somehow....attempting to separate yourself from the issues, only fuels the flame, as if walking away with a broken heart is not somehow better than walking away a broken person. Pain is temporary. And although some say nothing lasts forever, some things never end. I'll never understand her because I'm not supposed to, and maybe she'll never understand me because she doesn't know how.

Amen.

When keeping it real goes Wrong!



Just talking my girl last night and how some women front when ya'll first meet on "taking shits in the crib"...and then how when they get comfortable they start taking shits with the door open (lol) starting making me think about how much in relationships keeping it real goes wrong! Now I ain't nowhere innocent and all that, but I just think it's funny how one minute you can look at someone as being domesticated and refreshing but then the next like a fucking gladiator which led me to think the next story.....

     So one day I decided to go and try to surprise this chic I used to run with being that she was out of town and I had a copy of her house keys right. Anyway, so I go and jet up the street because I had to make some moves out that way anyway, slides by the grocery store and picked up a couple flowers, a card, and a some balloons I think and then went onto her house to put the whole thing in motion. Truth be told, she was coming back in town that night so I was just trying to get my babyboy stunt on so I can sit back and get blessed all week but nonetheless so there I am right. So while I'm at it, I even try to take it to another level, looking through her dresser drawers trying to get her lingerie sizes and all that but meanwhile I'm really trying to figure out whats the best spot to drop everything off at so she wont notice everything immediately as soon as she gets in the crib, rather after shes been there for a while.

     So I'm looking in every every room trying to figure out the best spot, I go in her bathroom..nothing, even started thinking what about the kitchen..nah, so then I go in the bathroom and started looking around for a place to sit the flowers and card and look down on the floor and saw a pair of  the nastiest, dirty ass underwear with poop stains of death looking like they had a brand new fresh shitsicle in em (lol) So now I realize: here I am with my whack ass holding flowers and some balloons in my hand while this girl is running around with gravy stains the size of GOD in her ass (lol). Yo I was bugging! I sat there for about 5 minutes starring at shit stains and scuff marks in my girls panties confused like a muthafucka bagging laughing. (lol) So of coarse a thriller like me can't ever let that slide right so I left her a note right on the toilet seat that said "baby I miss", dropped a rose petal right above the shit stains so she would know there ain't no way I wouldn't have seen it, threw everything else in the trash and rolled straight the fuck up outta that bitch.

Yours Truly - Amtrax

...It was All Good Just a Week Ago

     I think it's funny as hell how much a woman can stress a man, getting so caught up in being emotionally stressed, yet not even considering how suffocating they have become or how much they are actually creating a worse situation and pushing him away at the same time. In a perfect world I'd think the solution would be pretty obvious, try and wear the shoe on the other foot sometimes and just try and be more consciousness of the unintended consequences of your actions, but yet and still somehow I always seem to find myself in these ridiculous ass situations where I feel like the only way to resolve my differences is either to punch her time clock and move on with someone else who'll hopefully make life seem a little more easier or reverse roles, switch up, and make the woman play the same same hand that's being dealt to you. Clearly the 2nd option definitely poses greater conflicts of interest, can become extremely messy if you are dealing with a immature woman or even an insecure one for that matter, but I think whenever you become involved with someone where you find yourself constantly needing to put things in a "certain" perspective then unequivocally it'll probably seem the most natural to execute.



     Laugh now cry Later: Why is it 9pm, I've gotten off of work at 5pm from working 8 hrs, hadn't been able to get any sleep yet, gotta go into a 2nd job at midnight to work another 8hrs, and I'm arguing?  Because I've got a ignorant ass girl that's why! Now I only have 2.5 hrs to try and get some Z's real fast but this girl just wants to  keep running her mouth going on and on about our relationship like any of our real problems can really get resolved overnight anyway. So what are my options here? Lets see...

a.) Blow her off  - and I'm screwed 
b.) Try to appease the conversation just to get her to shut up - which I'll be wasting my time and I'm screwed 
or c.) tell her to get the f&ck out and then watch her bring her crazy ass right up to my second job and keep doing the same thing  - and I'm still screwed.

Well boys and girls the answer to truly deal with this type of situation is d.) Pull that same shit on her so she can see how it really feels!


     Revenge - Ahh, how sweet that sounds:  Aight so a couple nights ago I'm sitting in the crib chilling and my girl jumped up deciding I guess that she just was going to start talking all big-boy and reckless about me not washing clothes, slam whatever doors she felt , and have it her way like Burger King so I said to myself that's cool...I know how I'ma handle this, "I'ma do the same dumb ish she used to do to me", I'ma go in, f#ck her night up, and send her back to work the next morning with only a couple hrs of sleep in her just to see how she likes it. (lol)  Are these games being playing games you ask? Absolutely ! Now although to define the intricate level of  the details of what happened honestly is somewhat pointless, to make a long story short, from what started at about 12:30 midnight....she didn't end up going to bed until about 5:30- 6 o'clock in the morning, woke up at 8:20 but having to be to work by 8am, and then getting out of the bed and finding her bundled up in the hallway floor crying with her hands covering her face telling me it was my fault thinking she was gonna get fired (lol). Now here I have been hung out to dry for the past 6 months working 2 jobs and barely getting any sleep, and here she has done got broken down and folded on the 1st day (lol) Man I couldn't tell a better story, even if it was in a book!

Moral to the Story: Needless to say nobody got fired (bcuz she's really got her boss in her back pocket) but none the less I think it's unfortunate and shows a lack of maturity in that some people never seem to understand or sympathize with the way they are treating you until you subdue them to the same circumstances that they subdue you to....and even then, they still expect for you to honor their compromises when often times they've even failed or neglected to honor yours when the shoe was on the other foot. - Damn, what is this world coming to? Get a grip and or blow a dick - easy!

A Turn 4 The Worst



A yo let me give you all a piece of advice out there...whenever you are with someone who does what they feel although it openly defies what you wish opposed to what they know is right or wrong thats need to be done - SAVE YOURSELF it ain't worth it!

Roller Coasters


"Rollers Coasters" are exactly what you are going to get and what I've always got in dealing with emotionally unstable and insecure women. And chances are if it gets to a point when someones care for you inadvertently begins suffocating the relationship and they can't see it because they "know in their heart...." (lol) then congratulations playa you just jumped of the caravan of love! Don't got chasing roller coasters, if you feel fine right where you are at...

Goofy Things Women Do!

Preface: Now for most women, I'm sure this can go both ways because I'm sure just about every woman you talk to will probably have some played out story about how whack something somebody did was or how stupid "he" made his self look rollar coaster ride, but unfortunately the reality is this ain't your blog or really about y'all this time, this is about me and the people I represent experiences and how whack we see things often become between men and women at times.

The Rundown: So, anyway...I wake up this morning, feeling fresh out of the pulpit and throw on a fresh pair of British Knights to go and get my car detailed and checked my Gmail account on my phone before I took off and for some reason or another I notice that I gotta email from a ex-girlfriend of a Beyonce YouTube video called "Why Don't You Love Me?" And to be honest, i ain't even gonna lie (lol)I know she has a couple of videos of me caught up in some kinky ish w/ her so at first she was trying to get aggy and put me on blast, but then when I opened up the video and it started playing it was some Beyonce bs talking about "why don't you love me? I thought I was enough for you...I've got class, I've even got a$$"..blah blah blah (you know how Beyonce do). So now here I am sitting in my car @ 10 oclock in the morning watching this whack ass Beyonce video laughing my ass off...thinking to myself - NO WONDER WHY SOME OF THESE WOMEN FIND THEMSELVES STRUGGLING JUST BE IN A HEALTHY GOOD RELATIONSHIP. Think about it, here it is (or was) the night of the 4th of July and I'm fresh out doing my one two thing getting my celebray on just like everybody else and this chic is (who's obviously online) sending me YouTube subliminals @ 11oclock at night.



















Words of Advice: Look...if you've ever read the book "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars" then read it again....that self conscious subliminal emotional ish might work in order to cultivate relationships amongst women because you all nurture internally and process emotions in the same way, but men are masculine by virtue which means you have to appeal to them w/ physicality and rationale first so if you ever would like to express how you feel, me especially, just come knock on my door man w/ some reading glasses on or when you see us in passing by just ask when it would be a good time talk. To often women just try and take the subliminal route instead of the virtuous one and then wonder why even if they put their hearts on the line they still get disrespected.

The "He Was Only a Jump-off" Conundrum

What I thought was common to me, this has gotta be one of the most sleaziest and unsophisticated ways that I've seen some women play themselves, by referring to any of the men that they've been with in the past as a "jump-off" (even if he is) easily.... it's gotta be one of the easiest ways of ensuring as a female you get looked over by a man. Now I ain't the smartest man on earth but it seems to me that proclaiming that the men that you've been with previously or referring to the situations that you've had in the past as "jump-offs" is probably the last thing a woman should probably do especially to someone new or to someone who hasn't had the opportunity to understand your personality yet.

The Reality: I've actually had some women mention to me and seen women refer to ex's, "oh him", and previous engagements as "jump-offs" citing how "real they keep it" or how "they ain't gonna front like them other b!tches" almost as if a lack of sophistication in the way you represent yourself should be endured by the listener as a flag of honor or merit badge. Must be a generation X thing....

Moral to the Story: Get it together! Some of us can't keep a secret but we've all got a past. If you are conscious about your future then be conscious of the way  you represent and express your past because ultimately many of the things you do and say today will have a direct impact of the way the world will look @ you and receive you tomorrow.